Saturday, February 28, 2009

Teen Angst (more old writing)

I am not a girl. I am not an adult, yet. I am not a child. I am not white, I am not black, I am not yellow, I am not rich, I am not poor, I am not nothing. I am not dead. I am not loved. I know not what I am, but I do know w hat I am not. I am not intelligent. I am not good at math. I am not. I am not what my parents want me to be. I am not as I want me to be. I am not a wielder of slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, but I am not one who does not suffer from these slings and arrows of outrageous fortune. I am not one to dislike Shakespeare. I am not a liberal. I am not a member of the religous right. I am not normal. Apparently, I am not a real Indian, at least according to those kids in the cult of IASA. I am not one to eat like them, talk like them, dress like them, eat liek them, listen to their not music, or enjoy their not culture. I am not one to share their interests or their vices, there fore I am not Indian for I am not one to fit in their box of what it means to be Indian. I am not what I seem. I am not a druggie, I am not an alcohlic. I am not a cigarette smoker. I am not skinny. I am not liked. I am not what I'm not. I am not cultured. I am not confident. I am not sure of myself. I am not attractive. I am not gay. I am not sure of what I am. I am not me. I am not not me.

Man pursuing Awesome (more old writing)

*snick*, the gear shift slides into 4th. The revs build. The mechanical din of engine noise steadily builds, mere inches behind my head, a beautiful symphony of metal, and petroleum products. The exhaust note builds to a shrieking crescendo, as two red needles sweep upwards in unison. An accelerator pedal is depressed to the floor, the wind rushes by, the scenery's all a blur, sweat drips down my heart beats...louder...and eyes water...every ounce of brain matter I possess is intently focused, concentrating on the road ahead, the cars behind, and my own car, listening to the roar of the 3.0litre Gurney-Weslake V12, feeling the road, the wheels occasionally skittering along the sometimes rough track, there isn't much r.oom for error at speeds upwards of 150 miles an hour, especially not in a 1967 Formula One car. There are no aerodynamic aids, minimal safety precautions, this is living on the edge, this is man pursuing awesome, this takes jupiter sized balls of steel. The track surface is riddled with bumps and holes, a driver has a one in three chance of dying every time he races. ... Why do I do it?...
Brake, downshift, the engine gurgles and spits, clip the apex, take the proper racing line, feel the rear end start to swing wide, counter steer, it snaps back, put your foot into it, watch the revs build, *snick* back up into fourth, *snick* up into fifth, a 12 cylinder orchestro roars behind my head building to a barrel-chested shrieking crescendo. The G-forces build as I pass 200 miles an hour on teh long back straight, The adrenaline rushes to my head, my palms sweat, my heart beats...louder, and louder...and louder. I crest the hill and feel the tires leave the ground, and the entire car is launched into the air, "Oh shit! This could go bad," The car hits the ground with an ominous thud and a very expensive sounding crack. The rear end breaks loose, "FUCK", I despearately try to regain control, fishtailing through the stretch, but its no use, the car goes into a spin the rear comes all the way aorund, "SHIT!", I clip another car and gain more speed, the car continuing to spin, once, twice, thrice, four times, "Oh shit, Oh shit, Oh shit, Oh shit!", I watch the world spin around, seemingly in slow motion as I relice what very well likely could happen. *Crack*, I hit a tree at 150 miles an hour. My nose catches the delightful smell of high-octane racing gas, oil, steel, a piston head's olfactory delight, a pleasant warmth envelopes me, "A pleasant warmth?, gasoline? SHIT!", flames erupt, brilliant orange, they engulf me..."OH SHIT I am going to die..."

Friday, February 27, 2009

Opel to partially break away from GM

The International Herald Tribune reports that GM Europe Executives who state that Opel needs $4.2 billion in government aid to stay afloat want to distance Opel somewhat from GM:

Managers envision Opel becoming a "legally demarcated, at least partly independent business unit," GM Europe President Carl-Peter Forster said after Adam Opel GmbH's supervisory board met at its Ruesselsheim, Germany headquarters. Forster heads the board, the equivalent of a U.S. board of directors.

Pardon the ridiculous formatting, but Bloggers being dumb right now. Anyways I think this really isn't a good move on GM or Opel's part, as Opel definitely would have a lot of trouble competing in the European Market place against Ford Europe, VW etc. Adam Opel GmbH isn't a large enough corporation to be independent, additionaly GM's British subsidary, Vauxhall relies mostly on selling rebadged Opels, (Opel isn't sold in the U.K, and Vauxhall isnt' sold on the continent). In the end it really depends on a number of factors but mainly, how Vauxhall would be dealt with, and how independent Opel would be, would Opel be able to take advantage of GM's size to support it? How independent would Opel be?, would it just be third-party investors, or would it be moving towards an independent company? I can see it working out well if Opel moves somewhat towards the same sort of relationship Mazda and Ford have, perhaps, with a greater GM Motors stake though. Maybe, Opel, Vauxhall, Saab should consolidate perhaps with either Saab or Opel being the holding company and GM holding a majority stake?

Expect a full-fledged Carpocalypse post, post my Japanese exam of hell.

I wish I could be this Awesome: 11 year old Finn piloting Evo Rally Car

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Forbidden Fruit...

That other British Motoring Show reviews the new Focus RS.
I want.

We're supposed to get the Euro-Focus State-side within the next two years, it'll probably be a little bit decontented just for cost reasons, because the fact remains that the American people are not willing to drop 30 large on a small car with a Ford badge. Ford is however in the process of re-tooling Wayne Assembly to build Euro Focus (C1) based cars and most likely the European Focus as well.

Monday, February 23, 2009

Car Porn for the Weekend:

Turn your speakers up to 11. One of the best adverts of all time, out of all adverts not just car adverts.

Australia Embodies Awesome. Cars so masculine they have to shave the front bumper every morning..

Australia gave us Mad Max, which is a trilogy of awesome put to celluloid.
Australia also gets to run around in full size V8 Falcons, and Turbocharged Six powered Falcons, total sleepers, and legit BMW 5-series beating performance cars.

Check out
Check out
Check out

The next step is to change your pants after sufficiently making a mess in them.
Then look up tickets to Australia. Thats what I did. Why the eff can't we get this shit here, I mean like come on, this is the last pure iteration of the CLASSIC AMERICAN FULL SIZE SEDAN, and it is totally, and completely modern. We got the G8 and then asshats went and killed it but come on ford you can get us the Falcon, can't you, can't you, can't you? Please? I would do unmentionable things if it just meant that they'd bring the Falcon over here. Thats a promise. Alan, call me.

Check out this total sleeper F6 E concept over at World Car Fans. I want it, though of course I'd prefer the six speed manual.

Falcon FPV commercial

Ford v. Holden (just like Ford v. Chevy State Side) this is from Top Gear Australia, its not as good as Top Gear, but whatever, its all I can find.

The Hotted Up versions, also from Top Gear Australia.

Bridge-Loan Madness

The Detroit News has found (not surprisingly) that most of the government's "Presidential Task Force on the Automotive Industry" a) either drive foreign cars, or don't own a car at all...

Geithner owns a 2008 Acura TSX, registered in New York. He once owned a 1999 Honda Accord and a 2002 Acura MDX, according to public records


His maternal grandfather, Charles Moore, was a vice president at Ford Motor Co. from 1952-63, according to Peter Geithner, the secretary's father. But Geithner wasn't very interested in cars growing up -- in part because he graduated from high school in Asia, his father said.

Summers owns a 1995 Mazda Protege that's registered in Massachusetts. He previously owned a 1996 Ford Taurus GL.

What other task force members drive:

• Office of Management and Budget Director Peter Orszag owns a 2008 Honda Odyssey and a 2004 Volvo S60. He previously owned a 1997 Jeep Grand Cherokee and 1982 Datsun.

• Carol Browner, the White House climate czar, said earlier this month at the Washington Auto Show that she doesn't own an automobile. Public records show she once owned a 1999 Saab 9-5 SE.

• Energy Secretary Steven Chu doesn't own a car, his wife, Jean Fetter, said in a telephone interview on Sunday. Cabinet officials are typically transported to and from work by security officials in government vehicles.

• Environmental Protection Agency Administrator Lisa Jackson owns a 2008 Toyota Prius and a Honda Odyssey minivan, she said Sunday. "It's great," she said of her Prius.


Here's what task force policy aides drive:

• Austan Goolsbee, staff director and chief economist for the White House Economic Recovery Advisory Board, owns a 2004 Toyota Highlander.

• Joan DeBoer, the chief of staff to LaHood, said in an interview Sunday she drives a 2008 Lexus RX 350. She doesn't consider herself "a car buff" and views her car as a way to get around town.

• Heather Zichal, deputy director of the White House Office of Energy and Climate Change, owns a Volvo C30, according to public records and officials.

• Gene Sperling, counsel to the Treasury Secretary, owns a 2003 Lincoln LS, and previously owned a 1993 Saturn SL2.

• Edward B. Montgomery, senior adviser to the Labor Department, owns a 1991 Harley-Davidson and previously owned a 1990 Ford Taurus L station wagon, public records show.

• Lisa Heinzerling, senior climate policy counsel to the head of the EPA, owns a 1998 Subaru Legacy Outback station wagon, according to her husband.

• Diana Farrell, the deputy National Economic Council director, doesn't own a vehicle. Her husband, Scott Pearson, owns a 1985 Peugeot 505 S.

• Dan Utech, senior adviser to the Energy Secretary, owns a 2003 Mini Cooper S two-door hatchback.

• Rick Wade, a senior adviser at the Commerce Department, owns a 1998 Chevrolet Cavalier and previously owned a 1998 Toyota Corolla.

• Jared Bernstein, Vice President Joe Biden's chief economist, owns a 2005 Honda Odyssey.

President Barack Obama traded in his Chrysler 300C for a more fuel-efficient Ford Escape hybrid during the 2008 presidential campaign.

Joe Biden, the son of a car dealer, owns a 1967 Chevrolet Corvette -- a wedding present from his dad. He primarily commuted from Delaware to the Senate on Amtrak.

Ron Bloom, a special adviser to the Treasury Department who is also advising the task force, owns an aging Ford Taurus.

What this mostly shows, is that with the exception of V.P. Biden, Dan Utech, Gene Sperling, and Heather Zichal and on the chance that Diane Pearson's husband's Peugeot 505 S is the Peugeot 505 Turbo S (a gear head can hope), and not the basic Peugeot 505 S gas/Diesel..(in which case...he's just holding onto an old car)....the taskforce has terrible taste in cars.

Also, EPA lady, are you f***ing kidding me, a Prius, are you f***ing serious, not only could you not get anymore stereotypical, It shows you don't really understand the situation, The Prius as a system is more toxic than regular car, the resources to make the batteries in the Prius and the batteries themselves in the Prius (which might I add won't really last that long) are far more toxic, if you really cared about the environment you wouldn't drive a hybrid, its just a fashion statement, and i'm inclined to think you're just a shallow b***. I'm sorry but in get incensed about this sort of mis-information and general stupidity. If you really want to be kind to the envirmonment, keep an old car running.

Also, the fact that basically around half of these fucktwats don't even own a car, makes me think that they don't really understand what the Big Three need, actually, strike that, I know they don't know what the Big-Three needs. I'm sorry, reliability has caught up, and fuel economy meets or exceeds the Japanese. And Oye, Liberals, your great corporate saviour Toyota with its Prius as the magic salve to fix all the worlds problems? Yeah, that Toyota, that Toyota has a lower fleet average than GM, and sells more big 'gas-guzzlers' and SUV's than GM, so keep on smoking your crack pipe.

Brings me to another rant, people should be able to buy whatever the fuck they want, get rid of CAFE, if people want to pay for 'shitty' fuel economy, than let them. The simple fact of the matter is that the American people have proved time and time again that they simply do not REALLY want incredibly fuel-efficient cars. We don't need 35 mpg fleet, thats ridiculous, and we certainly do not need to be "matching" Europe in fleet fuel economy...because lets see, they drive on smaller roads, at collectively lower speeds for the most part, their cars are smaller, because they use them differently, they don't tow stuff etc. And their emissions regulations aren't nearly as stringent, neither are their safety regulations. Oh, probably at least half of the European fleet is diesel. Yeah, but diesel is a dirty word here isn't it? You guys want your safety standards, your emissions standards, and 'fuel economy'.
I'd like to after collectively bitch slapping Congress and Government as a whole, with the exceptions of a few select people, tell them that they can't have thier cake and eat it too, you want good fuel economy? cut out weight, you can't have cars that weigh 5 tons get the fuel economy you want, and trust me the way safety standards are moving thats where we'll be at. After doing this I'd like to collectively bitch-slap them again, and then I'd like to single out most of the Republican Senators from the South, as well as Barney Frank and the rest of those characters that grilled the auto-industry and acted like they knew every thing about the auto-industry and didn't grill the Banks at all and just gave them loads and loads of money for perpetual bitch-slapping. Chuck Hagel, Thaddeus McCotter, and John Dingell I would excuse from the bitch-slapping. Well Chuck isn't in congress any more but I wish he still were.

HOWEVER, back to my main point, the car companies just need money, they don't need to be told what to make, they are perfectly on track with that, or were until the government started interfering whch I definitely think is the reason for the shutting down of GM HPD, the shuttering of Pontiac as a brand (after they invested SO much money into Zeta), the reason we're not getting anymore Zeta platform cars. YOU FUCKING KILLED A WORLD-CLASS BMW BEATING RWD MID-LARGE SIZE SCALABLE PLATFORM, WTF CONGRESS, WTF. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME, YOU KILLED WORLD CLASS PRODUCT, b/c American's need small cars, and then when american's don't buy small cars you'll pat yourself on the back congratulating yourself for "forcing" The Big 3 (2.8 really but whatever it'll always be the Big 3 to me), to bring small cars over, and then watch the american car companies fail, and blame them for the failure, while you piss away loads and loads of our tax payers money. Nice, Congress you are all real geniuses.